About Me

The Real Story of My Life and More...

When I was young, I wanted to go to Space. We worked and Dad worked all the time in a factory, never sick. Drunk and drank when there wasn’t work but had skills. Excellent Cement Mason and spoke at least 5 languages. 3rd grade only because Hungary was at beginning of WWII. I figure he’s about 13 years old. Taught me if I wanted to build models of LEM module that landed on the Moon and subscribe to scene monthly issues. Had to not do chores for no allowance. Go across street with push mower and do harder lawn for $2.

Tried to be a basket case, but couldn’t fit in!

This life, this game is constant cycles and circles. I’m in it, to win it. I ain’t shy, I ain’t backing down. I’ll step back, but watch out when I step up, I’ll step strong with heart, head, and passion. Lead, follow, or get the hell outta my way!

I watched assassination over and over, his speeches at the website https://www.ushistory.org/documents/ask-not.htm

I was home sick, not at school watching black and white channel 3 tv.

I wonder if a might be that people think too often, “If somebody hurts me? What am I going to do!” Instead of nobody is hurting anybody. It’s okay, I’m keeping it going!

Not too much about before or future but when it happens make it count. Technology like Biology seems to expose us to constantly more vulnerabilities each moment. People react with disproportionate Paranoia. A healthy dose, no more or less is required, like everything in life. Why are newscasters talking so excitedly? Don’t they think I’m watching? I miss Walter Cronkite! and his objectivity! The irony. We thought it was boring!

I guess this heat has turned me into a Cactus Hippie.

Most of Society’s problems start with individual solutions.

Since November 1973, age of 18, now 64 reflecting with each progression applied lessons learned from success and failures (most often occurring). I went the Manual Labor, Military Service, Machine trades, Apprenticeship and Academia. Each promising a better life with effort and discipline. Thru not they no many willing to go to work assuming some might be in their bunk at night. Not many, and some might not!

I am a laid back kind of gentleman, tryin to find a purpose in life to make it the best along with my cats in the Sunny Southwest USA.

Since I was 17, I’ve felt my life so hard to stabilize because events seemed as if I were “Going thru the wringer”. In response I either extend an open hand or if rejected, then comes the middle finger!

As a child, my parents bought a set of encyclopedias. It was crucial to integrating into “America”. Other languages were more natural than English. Living in a city of subcultures finding refuge from the horrors of WWII. I read a great deal as a child. Parables were my favorite. The books were adequate but not especially comprehensive source. I spent many weekends at Barberton’s library. We didn’t have electronics to distract.

For 64 years, I’ve lived, laughed, worked, and loved with some of you across the nation and overseas. Served myself, others and the Nation. Taken 2 Oaths very seriously. One for citizenship. One for the Military. Oaths never die, never fade, never forget. Never forgive!

What bothers me most is that being American just seems to be an “Accident” for most people. They are ignorant of World calamities and our Blessings.

I actually chose and studied and worked to prove my worth to call myself an American Citizen and fulfill my father’s dreams and I continue to do so every day with every thought and deed. God Bless America and God Bless us all.

I screwed up. I had and “Ace in the Hole”. I never put the Adoption idea into the boys mind. Had plenty of heated arguments privately between my ex. She wanted control. I worked, no alcohol, drugs, weapons for children. Education work and play. 18 years if raising 2 boys from different men.

My own family disappeared when I turned 18. Like holding a fistful of sand when the Tide comes in.

Biker bar downtown by Fire Station, factories, and post office with an Ex-Navy Seal was my buddy. Live bands, good pool table and juke box. Quiet evenings too and one of my favorite places that no one knew. Gene was a welder at B&W, his wife ran the bar and the nicest family you would ever meet. Absolutely amazing and what really matters!

Growing up I enjoyed cartoons more than Dad lessons that gave me thought then comic books, my set of encyclopedias, school’s library and Barberton’s Library for many days exploring various mythologies for many cultures. Even Avant Garde magazines, Mad, Heavy metal, Omni and yes Playboy too! Seeking sources to questions to not be bored.

“Every generation blames the one before. All their frustration, comes beating on your door. I know I’m a prisoner to all my father held so dear. I know that I’m a hostage to ask his hopes and fears. Wish I could’ve told him.”

Istvan Sinkovich, Drill Sergeant Perez-Ortiz. Hope they ended well.

Not apologizing, clarifying ground rules, short on patience, been rode hard, put away wet too many times. Won’t suffer jokers, tokers, tweeters, metheads, and meatheads 2. Staying HUMAN avoiding your negativity. Practicing happy, not blue. Bring problems 2 my door. I’ll bend once in your storm but twice shy is a good rule so respect the limit. If you start a whirlwind don’t drag me in it. Once in, all in to the limit. You don’t know mine and don’t wanna. Prefer to write than fight. Better at fighting. Still Standing PROUD!!! That’s when I say nothing. I let Aristotle turn over in his grave and the reason is gone. Let him nap.

I’ve always done what “they” said no. Just to see not outta spite to prove to myself and I am.

Looking back, going from non-drinking Doctoral candidate at a nice liberal university, to opioids, divorce and DUI’s was a really “Strange Trip” but I just kept on “Truckin”!

From 2002-2007, I felt like a sweater I had learned to knit as a child. Someone took a razor, cut diagonally from shoulder to hip. Imagine holding 2 ends of a cut rope. I scrambled as my life rapidly unmasked and unraveled crumbled between the fingers of both fists. Too many threads make up life as times goes by.

The Story……..